Анекдот - Первое свидание

"My son, there are three subjects that always work (мой сын, есть три темы, которые всегда "работают"; subject [`sLbdżıkt]).
These are food, family, and philosophy (это еда, семья и философия; philosophy [fi`los∂fı])."
The boy picks up his date (встречается со своей "девушкой" /date означает и свидание, и человека, с которым у вас свидание/) and they go to a soda fountain (и они идут к автомату с газировкой; fountain [`fauntın]).
Ice cream (мороженое; ice - лед, cream - сливки) sodas in front of them (перед ними), they stare at each other for a long time (они смотрят (пристально) друг на друга долго), and the boy's nervousness builds (и нервозность парня растет). He remembers his father's advice (он вспоминает отцовский совет), and chooses the first topic (и выбирает первую тему).
He asks (спрашивает) the girl, "Do you like spinach? (ты любишь шпинат; spinach [`spınıdż])" She says "No," and the silence returns (и тишина возвращается; silence [`saılens]).
After a few more uncomfortable minutes (несколькими неуютными = неловкими минутами позже; uncomfortable [Ln`kLmf(∂)t∂bl]; minute [`mınıt]), the boy thinks of his father's suggestion (думает об отцовском совете; to suggest [s∂`dżest] - предлагать, советовать) and turns to the second item on the list (и переходит ко второму пункту списка; item [`aıt∂m]). He asks, "Do you have a brother? (у тебя есть брат)" Again (опять), the girl says "No" and there is silence once again (и снова тишина).
The boy then plays his last card (затем разыгрывает свою последнюю карту). He thinks of his father's advice and asks the girl the following (следующий) question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach? (если бы у тебя был брат, он бы любил шпинат)"

• Версия на Английском без подсказок

  A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice.
  The father replies, "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy."
  The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy's nervousness builds.
  He remembers his father's advice, and chooses the first topic.
  He asks the girl, "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns.
  After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.
  The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father's advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"